This Gallery contains some of my paintings - the ones I have photos of. The Gallery is divided into two sections: paintings from the previous century (before the year 2000) and paintings from this century (2000 onwards).

Most of the paintings I drew during the last century have been given away, after an exhibition that I had in the year 1995, to commemorate having lived in Finland for 10 successive years, at the time. (See the image of the Exhibition Invitation brochure on this page as well as the scanned list of the names of the paintings that were in the Exhibition). Altogether, there were 42 paintings on display.

Many sketches and drawings that I had made along the years were excluded and I now regret that I have not saved them, so they cannot be "immortalized". One of my passions during my early adulthood, especially when I was studying Nursing, was to copy anatomical drawings from anatomy and physiology books. I had many copybookds full of drawings of cells, the muscular system, the digestive system, the brain, etc. Another passion of mine was to copy famous paintings, especially Escher and Frida Kahlo. It was from this desire to reproduce to the minutest detail drawings I appreciated and found stimulating that I slowly started to depict images that were the product of my own imagination and based on a very compelling need to describe how I experience a certain situation, event or my personal thoughts.

So, having spent 10 years in Finland seemed like a landmark in my life, and I wanted to "emerge" into existence, somehow, because living in this remote country, I felt that I had buried myself here and lost all contact with not only my origin, but even myself! I wanted to express the fact that I have not ceased to exist, even though nobody around me seemed to recognize or be aware of my other dimensions. Namely, the internal world that I live in, but do not share with so many around me.

The reactions I got to my exhibition were not understanding or encouraging enough for me to take up art as a form of expression. I decided that in the time and place that I find myself in, the only thing that matters is material security and that can only be achieved through steady employment and academic disciplines, so I changed course and shed my need to be extroverted and exchanged it with a very introverted style of life, all the time waiting, hoping and praying that I would get a "break" and be propelled elsewhere...

That break did come! The real landmark in my life came in the year 1999, when I had already spent 14 successive years in Finland. I "was saved" from the tedium and pressures of "living in exile in isolation". I got lucky and moved to Armenia, where I lived from the end of 1999 till the end of 2003. I had to return to Finland, but I had changed a lot, which is obvious also from the change in style and themes of my paintings during and after my "Armenia period".

At the turn of the century, I gave many of my paintings from the pre-Armenia era away to people I knew. They had ceased to mean all that much to me. Many of them are quite disturbing souvenirs from a time in my life that I would rather forget, because my search for my identity, roots and a sense of belonging, as well as my painful processing of the past, are etched in them. One friend of mine said about my exhibition, you could call it "The Hitchcock Gallery!", which describes the frenzied intensity incumbent in the paintings. It is only after so many years have elapsed since I held the exhibition and gave them away that I am able to look at them with a sense of detachment and give an unemotional account of what was on my mind when they I was engrossed in producing them.

 The "Post-Armenia Era" found me producing much less and more simple and maybe even joyful and optimistic impressions on a range of very different topics from before. In this Gallery, you will find them in separate folders, as I have stated above. What all my paintings have in common, I think, is that they reveal the adaptation and acclimatization efforts I have made and continue to make in order to integrate, without becoming assimilated.

At present, I must say that I have a very ambivalent relationship to Finland, even though I appreciate many things about this country and would sincerely like to be a useful and constructive member of this society, for as long as I have no other place to go.

In my short description of each painting, I mention who has has the original painting, in case I remember who I gave it to. Some of the originals have been lost and I only have photos of them. Some originals have been lost without a trace. Still, these examples probably reveal about me some sides and aspects, which are hard to communicate in any other way. Whether they reflect positively or negatively on me as a person, they are all attempts at organizing and improving my inner world and learning to cope with the external world to the best of my ability. At heart, I am very conservative, and have never wanted to shock or shake anyone. Yet, I must admit, that I have since childhood believed firmly in the freedome of expression, but have luckily been taught that the right to speak out, act out and demonstrate must always be accompanied by a sane, balanced and controlled sense of purpose. Hopefully, I can live up to this ideal, and avoid immature, premature or purely provocative statements for their own sake. Since we are looking at them in retrospect and since I try to explain them rationally and logically, I believe and pray that they are in no offensive, harmful or insulting to anyone´s sense of propriety or any other standards or sensitivies.

Like I said, I have changed a great deal. These are just footsteps I have taken towards deeper and more profound realizations (one can hope).

 I continue to paint sporadically. I hope to keep developing mentally and spriritually. I share this side of my inclinations with you in the good faith, that you will feel free to like or dislike any of my works, in part or full. After all, I do not take myself very seriously even as an "amateur painter. What is the population of the globe and the percentage of talented people in it?  I am a mere speck of dust in the Sahara, not even that. Especially if I never publish what I have in store .... :)